Those balls look pretty dangerous.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
