NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize