she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
