Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
we're so committed to being not committed
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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