already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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