I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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