is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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