Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
