he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
