I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
