The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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