I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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