Dual....:-)
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Michael Bay diarrhea
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
