I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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