Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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