Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
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Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
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I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance