just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
