I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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