I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize