i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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