dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
