It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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