Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
PANTIES FOUND
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