i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
