apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
