sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
