Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
