there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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