jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
