um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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