I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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