Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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