I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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