I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
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I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
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You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
The ass gains better be worth it
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