It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
