Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
