i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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