I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Mom said you looked used
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
