is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i barfeds in our rink
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
