i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
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Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
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you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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