i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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