That's intense
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
