if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
be right there i have to get my cape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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