shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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