id be glad to
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
