do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
