I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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