And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
