puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
