We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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