sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I stole a fireplace last night.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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